Sunday, January 9, 2011

Edit.

I now realize that the title of the last post might have made it sound like I had done a recap of the game, or at least had something worthwhile to add to the discussion. If that's more what you were looking for, allow me to help

Chiefs - Ravens Breakdown"


- Chiefs - squander opportunities and turn the ball over
- Ravens - slowly add on points in a way that keeps the Chiefs in the game despite them trying to hand you a victory.

* * * * * * *

Seriously, the most boring, least impressive 30-7 victory, because they were handed the game by the Chiefs. Ravens still with work to do.

Ravens beat the Chiefs, will play the Steelers.

I feel like the Ravens are falling into the the NFL equivalent of Ground Hog Day. For the last couple years now, the highly anticipated, hard hitting matches between AFC North rivals seem to go something like this:

Game 1:
 - Ravens play the Steelers in an early season game with little pressure. Ravens win. Infuriating 'smack talk' and lack of overall football knowledge begins.

Game 2:
- In a later game with much more on the line in terms of play-off seeding and division titles, the Ravens play the Steelers and lose. Commence complaining about the officials, lost of "Pittsburgh sucks!" chants and lack of overall football knowledge.

Game 3 (Optional):
- Game 3 only happens when both teams face each other in the play-offs. To do this the Ravens must win the Wild Card spot (because, naturally, Pittsburgh has already wrapped up the division crown). After securing a play-off spot the Ravens will play their first game and win, and find out that their opponent in the next round is the Pittsburgh Steelers. Here, we tend to see an barrage of Facebook statuses that refer to the Purple People Eaters as either "My boys, men," or any other unflattering terms. Baltimore fans, forever faithful to their team, will talk about how they won't lose to Pittsburgh again and this is surely their season.

*Enter loss to Pittsburgh*
*Exit Raven bravado, initiate whining, complaining and lack of overall football knowledge.*

Such is the way of things, and to be honest I would not be the least bit surprised if next weekend's third meeting between the two teams did not prove any different. I've already seen the Facebook posts. You heard it here first.


Friday, January 7, 2011

Whatever happened to...

I'm playing the newest Call of Duty game, and the graphics are intense. My friends and I are playing 4 player co-op against some AI bots that we've given different personalities and difficulties. Currently, I'm cycling through my myriad of weapons looking for what I want to use next, my mind tells me that the one-shot, one-kill knife would be the most fun, but my gut tells me to go with something that packs some more fire power. Just then, my radar flashes red behind, and I wheel my character around to find....

/End day dream.

Really, I'm just playing 007-Night Fire, inevitably in the less than desirable video quality of a Playstation 2 game, because Lord knows that no retail store carries original X-Box titles, and don't bother looking for a first-person shooter that is as awesome as Night Fire on a next-gen system.

An oldie, but a goodie

And this is where my rant on this new wave of shooting, action games begins. Sure, the graphics are awesome, and the story lines intense. The online play adds a fun element, but the realism has gone to far. 

I want my shooting games to have co-op, offline multi-player. And I want, nay, demand that AI bots be incorporated. What was better than assembling a team of Space Suit Bond and his cronies to mow down at your pleasure. I want to be able to carry a rocket launcher, two machine guns, countless grenades, a crossbow, some laser beam cannon thing, and a big, ole' revolver. I want to be able to cycle through all these with one button, and I want to be able to decide to use Oddjob's throwing hat as my weapon, because there is nothing more satisfying than decapitating Pussy Galore as she turns around and tries to line you up.

FPS (first-person shooter) games today only let you carry a main weapon, a side weapon, and only a few grenades. Maybe if I wanted to take part in some actual combat simulation that would appeal to me, but I want pure, unadulterated war.

In an attempt to get game designers to listen to me, I'm starting a petition in the comments section, so make sure you post (no this is not an attempt at getting reader participation). Realism is taking away our fun. We must stop it now. Now, I have some more Night Fire to play.